I often hear people say that they would love to do a regular home yoga practice but they don’t know where to start. So, here we go – step by step, so you really can do it. Yes, you!
Step One. Why? Why do you feel you want a home yoga practice? Connect to your ‘why’ as powerfully as you can. Is it to connect into your self each day, to give your body what it needs each morning, to find a quiet minute to organise your thoughts, or a quiet space where your day can begin on your terms? Do you have a real motivation to keep your body healthy and fit or to reclaim some of the strength and fitness you used to have? Knowing your real 'why' will help keep you going when you make it conscious. Write it down, get really into the nitty-gritty – why does it matter, and does it matter a little, or a lot? Is it just a whim, or if you have the tools and the guidance, will you really commit to it, even for just two weeks to start with and then you can re-evaluate?
A morning practice is often something that people grow into. If you set an intention to commit to your morning yoga for a certain, achievable length of time, this becomes something you can truly commit to. It's easier to commit to days, 21 days or 28 days rather than - forever! Then you can let it go after those days have passed, until you feel again the urge to make a new commitment for another length of time. Or perhaps once you’re on a roll of however many days you’ve committed to, you find that you’ve established a new habit and you will keep going just because it feels good.
You don’t want to feel the dreaded ‘should’ as in, ‘Oh no I SHOULD go and do my morning yoga again now, sigh’. If you’ve committed to it for just two weeks, it might be easier to keep motivated. And you know, it’s perfectly ok to let it go after your two weeks, for now. Maybe you’ll pick it up again in due course and maybe you won’t. Don’t let yourself go to that inner critic place that tells you what you should be doing and all the reasons you’re no good because you’re not doing it. That’s how to kill your motivation and enjoyment of your practice!
Step Two. Find your special yoga space. If you can leave your mat unrolled and ready for you, that’s a great way to set yourself up. Your yoga mat symbolises your sacred space, the place you go where you can be completely yourself. You will roll into your 5-15 min daily yoga practice most easily if it’s all set up and ready for you.
However, it would be, ideally, a respected space. The kids are not allowed to eat sticky jam sandwiches on your yoga mat. The dog is not allowed to lie on it after being outside in the rain. If it’s not possible to teach everyone else in your household that it’s only for you (with the possible exception of your cat, as long as she doesn’t flex her claws on that lovely surface) – don’t leave it out. It’s about everyone – including you – respecting your needs and your space…and this might not be easy for you to stand for!
Step Three. Set your alarm something like 5-15 minutes earlier each morning. Be realistic. What will you really manage to stick with? 90 minutes of yoga before work could be blissful, but who would ever manage to do that every day? Except yoga teachers, of course. (Do I really do that?? I’m not gonna tell ya).
Step Four. START! Turn up. Every. Single. Day. For those five minutes, for those two weeks, even if you have no idea what you’re going to do when you get there. Don’t expect to go into handstands or complicated postures. Don’t expect to know what you should do. Don’t think you’ll do a warm-up, some tricky postures, some pranayama (breath practice) and savasana (relaxation) along with a little dose of meditation, all within your fifteen minutes.
Step Five. What you could actually do when you get there – will come in my next newsletter in a couple of weeks! Sorry to keep you waiting. You could google ideas to get you started. Meanwhile, just turn up. Sit there/lie there/be on hands and knees. Be in a quiet space. Keep it simple. Turn your attention inward and listen to how you are. Take lots of deep breaths. Come into rocking movement or circling movements or stretching movements. Even five minutes of BEING STILL, BREATHING DEEPLY, and CIRCLING/STRETCHING MOVEMENTS will do you a world of good. Do it every single day if you can! And if you miss a day, please please don’t give yourself a hard time and throw your whole practice away, thinking you’ll never get it. Just turn up again the following day, or the one after that. Have patience and kindness with yourself. We are our own worst critic, aren’t we?
Next time: suggestions for your yoga practice each day.
And, why does that matter??
Do you find that too? When I do consciously to allow myself the time to just look out the window, I find myself picking up my phone (so I put that out of reach deliberately) or the nearest magazine or book (anything will do!) to distract myself or to feel as if I’m DOING something. Where does this difficulty in being able to be still come from and why is it so hard to allow ourselves to do?
Our Western world is so geared towards productivity. Probably much more than we are even aware of. We are programmed to be doing, achieving, crossing things off the list, ‘getting it done’. You feel that too? It’s as if we have become wired to ‘Do’; and if we’re not Doing we’re not being worthwhile people. We’re not earning our right to exist on this planet. We’re not validating our existence, in a society that intrinsically values accomplishing, not ‘just’ being.
And yet, there’s so much about self-care around at the moment too. Surely, self-care includes the possibility to just sit and look out the window, to daydream, to not think about anything in particular. To catch up with ourselves, to connect with ourselves, to not feel pressured to get on with the next thing.
Why does this matter? It’s actually pretty essential, I feel, to allow ourselves to be able to sit and Be. I find when I’m in one of those moods where I just can’t do that, I’m restless, I start ten different things and am distracted to the next thing before I’ve finished any of the others. When I notice that this is my frame of mind, I realise that I am caught in a web of adrenalin (or cortisol), ‘fight-flight-flee’ mindset. This will not do long-term because I will wear myself out! Like burning a candle too brightly. Focus, intention and clear thinking are gone – ‘It has to be done! Now! Or else!’
When I find that, magically, I AM in the frame of mind/body to just sit and Be, there are so many benefits happening behind the scenes. My body is relaxing, via the parasympathetic nervous system, that tells my being that I am safe and I can digest and rest. It gives me the space to connect with myself, my body, my emotions, my needs. Sooo important if we are going to take seriously the need to look after ourselves.
It can also be a real issue that somehow we just don’t’ feel we deserve to spend time ‘doing nothing’. We have subconsciously absorbed the learned behaviour that we are supposed to be looking after others, not mollycoddling ourselves. Not lounging when there’s work to be done and people to look after, others’ needs to be seen to. Our needs don’t matter like the others’ do! This surely has a deeper origin and will be the subject of a future reflection.